so, kween, it’s happening
i’m about to lose my art fair virginity at the Borders Art Fair – 14th to 16th March
& let me tell you, this whole thing has been a rollercoaster of deadlines, existential dread, & panic-buying of bougie Waitrose meal deals
if you’ve ever thought about doing an art fair, or what goes on BTS, then i’m here to give you the brutally honest, gloriously unhinged, & definitely sweary reality check
‘cause this isn’t just about showing up with some pretty paintings - it’s a full-blown logistical circus, & it turns out this is my circus & these are my f*cking monkeys
i mean firstly why even do an art fair?
why put myself through the possibility of a public flogging?
my thinking is that art fairs are where collectors, galleries, & people who actually buy art come to browse, fall in love with your work, & hopefully spend their hard-earned cash on something they can relate & connect with
i reckon it’s also a chance to get my name out there, build connections, & dare i say flex a wee bit - can’t believe i just typed that (kweenie you've changed!)
delivery guys in therapy...
if you're already one of my VIP kweens, you'll know about some of the prep i’ve been doing – erm think Barbie-sized purchases & delivery guys now in therapy (all true, btw!). want more backstage goss in real time? then click here to get my fierce friday thoughts
at times all the prep has felt like a descent into madness (well further than my usual madness anyway)
you would think the easy part would be finishing the work, eh? wrong!
‘cause suddenly, i forgot how to paint or spell – which turns out is crucial when you're an artist & use typography in your work!
i was saved only by my sheer will (erm mostly powered by a Nutella-induced sugar high - mere mortals would’ve slipped into a diabetic coma btw, but i’ve been training for this my whole life)
you would never know she nearly tipped me over the edge when you see her now!
"bestiest love" painted pop art collage featuring Marilyn Monroe
she will be available as an OG & as a hand painted multiple
& then there was signing my name on my OGs, i legit felt like i was 6 years old again practicing my signature in case i get famous one day
me signing my OG kweenie's & making them "legit"
also lovely wee shot of "x the line" pop art painted collage featuring Elizabeth Taylor
she will be available as an OG
maybe my work will be on “fake or fortune” in years to come & my signature will be the deciding factor?
(apologising now to those who inherit my 1st OGs as family heirlooms)
my soul leaving my body! WTF?
next was the framing fiasco, of which there were 2!
no.1 i had some frames & mounts so i could frame a few things myself - very cost effective kweenie, great planning but i patted myself on the back a wee bit too soon...
i had only gone & finished the framing, sealed it beautifully v profess if i do say so myself (not a dog hair or bit of fluff in sight) but i'd forgotten to photograph & sign the works - F - M - L!
me having a royal freak out when i realised what i'd done - doh!
amazing what you catch on camera now you have to document everything...
no.2 so i took the rest of my work to the framers
they were CLOSED!
temporarily
no warning
just a shut door with a hand scribbled note on it & my soul leaving my body! WTF?
nuff said really...
solution?
a quick detour to Waitrose for a bougie wee meal deal & a silent crisis in the car park
my 1st line of defence against a total menty b,
i know how to treat myself, posh right?
in between all of this i got sick!
great timing or what?
was stinking fluey vibes complete with the shakes
but when you're a 1 woman fempreneur it will take more than "man flu" to stop me
i just had to pivot (anyone else hear Ross from Friends whenever they read that word - no just me then!)
so i set about writing this blog post instead (mistypes on a keyboard from shaky hands are waay easier to correct than painting hunners of perfect gold lines on my hand painted multiples of "wing gal" & my "divinity" collection!
so, like i said at the start of this verbal diarrhea it takes waaay more planning than just turning up with some pretty pictures & i've thought long & hard about what i want my booth to look like & the vibes i want to give
i'm kinda walking a fine line between serious artist & cartoon character but i totally know i run the risk of being an actual parody of myself – eek!
low-key manifesting that sh*t!
i want the kweenie booth to feel bold, immersive, & f*cking iconic, but without making people wonder if i’ve totally lost the plot!
also, there’s a best in show stand prize up for grabs, which means a free stand next year, so yeah, i'm low-key manifesting that sh*t!
so, here’s what i’m bringing:
1. show stopping art in various sizes, OGs, exclusive artists proofs, hand painted multiples – obvs
2. my freshly facelifted kweenie crown to wear - cause why be basic when you can be extra, still working on my fits mind you? but there will be no pink dungarees 'cause this will be close to being out, out!
3. a few other crowns & tiaras to scatter – giving heavy royal vibes
4. a vase of roses made from kweenie £50 notes - straight from my royal mint
5. gold embossed seals - so people leave feeling like they’ve received a damehood
6. pre burnt candles in candle stick holders – to create that palatial vibe (not lit ‘cause health & safety would freak TF out)
7. a prize draw - (or should i say kweenie’s coronation draw) to win a fine art kweenie print – to casually collect email addresses like a marketing mastermind
8. kweeniegrams - my version of a certificate of authority for every OG & Ltd Edition sold
9. biz cards – the essential, mine are gorge but i’m thinking of a fresh twist on these for next time, maybe?
10. a branded table runner - to hang over my open table so i can hide my sandwiches... & possibly a sneaky wee hipflask to settle my nerves!
ok, set up is kinda under control so my next hurdle is, & probs the hardest part for me tbh!
greeting my public & talking about my work without imploding
at least two nips from my hipflask...
people love an artist’s story
but telling punters the real story behind my work?
that’s scarier than eating that homemade chicken curry i put in the freezer, 9 & three quarter months ago
like, for sure, it’s probably fine, but do i really want to risk it?
so, i’ve come up with a three-tier storytelling strategy:
1. tier 1: "my work is all about self-empowerment, rebellion, & resilience"
2. tier 2: "i started kweenie during a dark time, & it became my way of taking my power back"
3. tier 3: the full, raw truth. only ever uttered after at least two nips from my hipflask, but lets be clear this will be strictly for serious collectors & kindred kweens, not casual small talk over hipflask cocktails
so, this is where i’m at, less than one week out!
wish me luck, kween
& if you’re in the area & you want to see if i pulled it off or if i'm visibly regretting my life choices then pop into the Borders Art Fair 14th – 16th March
fancy 1st dibs on my art & a free drink then contact me here & i'll send you a link for the private view
love you, bye
kx
PS a few art fair survival tips (from someone currently losing her sh*t)
1. make your booth an experience:
don’t just show up with a table & some art – be memorable. if you can’t have a throne (too much), at least have a crown
2. have a marketing strategy (aka getting people to want to be on your email list):
hopefully my prize draw will work like a charm. people love free sh*t of the things they want, & i love growing my email list. win-win!
3. mentally prepare for small talk:
"so what’s your art about?" is coming for you. have an answer ready. hmm maybe swearing will help? internally of course!
4. fake confidence like your life depends on it
‘cause it kinda does. stand tall, rock your crown, & act like you belong - even if you’re internally f*cking spiralling!
x
2 comments
I saw you at the borders art fair and wow your stand was amazing, so funny to read this now, would never have known you were nervous at all, loved your work xx
My favourite part of a Friday is receiving your blog. Your drive and energy is hugely admirable and I just know that you’re going to crown them all at the BAF – see what I did there? It’s infectious as are you.